The Voice of the Child
Who is she?
What is her story?
'The Milky Bar Kid' - (Oil
on Canvas)
What is the story of 'The Milky Bar Kid' in the above
picture?
If she could tell us her story, if we could hear her
voice, what would she say?
Where we came from, what our forebears were like
and, are our behaviour and decisions influenced by them and where and how we were
brought up?
Do we really understand why we act and live the
way we do?
Sure, whilst researching our family history we may have
collected birth, death, divorce certificates, wills, school reports, letters,
certificates, awards, property documents, bills, publications where our family
names are mentioned. Of course, we have also collected various family
mementoes such as grandfather’s pipe or cigarette box, grandmas watch, her
glasses doileys, assorted plates, cups and various other things such as jugs,
statues and pictures.
We have collected and saved all these things because
they mean something to us and portray a life lived of someone we have loved but
passed on.
By keeping things, it helps us to continue the love and
remember people from our past. In fact, although they are in the past,
they remain present in our lives.
Indeed, we have very fond memories which we all
treasure and refuse to let go. This is
love. We must never forget because it is our memories of past family members
that remind us of whom we are and where we belong. It is a way of feeling
at home and we are at home wherever we are and remember and feel where we belong.
§
Throughout the world Indigenous people not only pass
down their native language to children but also tribal and family stories to
ensure the history, legends, beliefs and language are continued on throughout
the ages. If this is not done, once the stories, legends and language is gone,
they are gone forever.
If little care is taken, history and all that is
attached to the tribe and family are so easily lost. Once lost, it is
almost impossible to revive.
Thus it is with families in the modern world.
We have paper and sometimes digital records of family
history as well as the mementoes and family treasures.
However, the thing that is often missing are the
stories from grandma and grandpa, mum and dad, siblings, uncles and aunts, cousins etc.
Although we may have documented and written the family
stories which are evidence based via papers and other family members memories, there is so much more we can collect to gain a better knowledge of our
family history.
Take a deliberate action, make time with the family and
use what is needed to listen to mum, dad, grandma, grandpa, brothers and
sisters and even long time family friends.
The memories need to be audio or video recorded for
prosperity.
Sure mum and dad may have told their stories over and
over and over again, seemingly ad nauseum at times, but there is also so much
more to be told and so much more to be discovered.
§
My parents passed on many years ago yet here I am
older, perhaps wiser, but now I have been thinking about things I would like to
ask mum and dad.
Like, why did they do this, that or whatever, how come
they ended up in so and so and the biggie...what on earth was that big argument
about and why was mum so upset at something dad said while out on a special occasion
dinner at a really fancy restaurant? I
have the photo, mum still looks absolutely furious!
Then, there is the question, why was my dad and his
brother not talking for so many years?
Can I find out? No, they are all deceased., and
whatever these things were all about...is gone. The truth of the stories are gone forever.
There is so much more to learn by taking time and care
to sit down with the older generation, encourage them to talk and verbally record
their stories. You will be very surprised what you will find out. You may even gain a new understanding and
clear some unknown misconceptions.
§
Perhaps have a monthly special supper with one family
member and after dinner, sit, talk and listen. Not only hear their story, but listen, really listen. Oh, and don't forget to press the
'record' button.
Sure continue collecting all the family history
documents and articles, but one of the most valuable things in your collection
is recorded memories.
Don't wait til the oldies and their memories fade,
think about the next family gathering, a birthday celebration, wedding anniversary,
public holiday, barbecue, picnic or whatever, ask grandma what life was like
when she was a kid. Did she have many play mates, what was school like,
who was her best friend?
Hint: Ask open questions such as ‘why’, ‘how come’, 'what did you feel’? etc.
Folks, by doing it sooner rather than later, you may be
at grandma's final gathering and she may never again be able to tell you about
her life fully lived and experienced.
Cheers,
VERDE.
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